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Blog #31: Should you follow your ex on Instagram? Or should you mayyyybe block them? (A flowchart)

Social media makes everything more complicated

Each post is a great fucking adventure

As Seen On
by in Sex & Dating
May 14, 2019 0 comments

I was taking a Lyft ride recently with my friend, as we were talking about someone we’d seen on Instagram trashing their ex in public. This person had taken a video of themselves burning a picture of their ex and posted it to their stories.

“Is it wrong to judge?” I asked aloud. The driver, who’d been quiet up until this point, cut in:

“My friend called me,” he confessed. “He wanted me to check out his new girlfriend’s ex-boyfriend’s Instagram and send him screenshots. The ex-boyfriend seemed like a real loser.”

Well, if it was wrong to stalk someone and then judge them…….. well, we weren’t alone.

Did you know there was a time when breaking up with someone meant never seeing them again? Were you alive back in the old days? Literally, you’d never see them again, unless maybe they lived in your neighborhood. Then you’d just bump into them awkwardly at the gas station or Target, but not before trying to duck into the diaper aisle.

In short, social media makes 21st century dating a fucking shit show. In the old days, we had to let go. Now, you get to “see” That One Person for the rest of your life. And project all your fantasies and insecurities onto them.

Did you think you got ghosted on because he met someone “prettier”? Check his Instagram and decide for yourself. Did you think she dumped you because she cheated? Now, you can look it up!

Social media allows us the chance to become the internet loser who lurks on the Instagram Stories of That Person You Went On One Date With Two Years Ago. As the illustrious Lady Gaga once said, “Social Media is the Toilet of the Internet.” And you, my social media stalker friend, want to remove yourself from the Shit.

It’s okay! We have all been there. But let’s take a good look at ourselves and start with a handy flowchart.

And, if you have anything else to contribute to the flowchart? Let me knowwwww!

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Each post is a great fucking adventure